“He that passeth by, and meddleth with strife belonging not to him, Is like one that taketh a dog by the ears.” — Proverbs 26:17
Strife is conflict, disagreement, argument, or dispute. The temptation to involve oneself in strife is stronger for some than it is for others, yet there’s some magnetic pull for almost everyone. And in the social media-driven world we live in, weighing in on an argument is more accessible and attractive than ever. One might feel better about giving their opinion, stating the facts, or correcting, but according to Proverbs, the outcome is pretty sure — it is like taking a dog by the ears. In other words, there’s a 99% that you will be bit. Here are a few thoughts to consider before involving yourself in someone else’s matter:
Judge rarely and cautiously. There are times you need to make a judgment call, but be careful before you judge someone else’s motives or opinions. God is the ultimate judge, and there are plenty of people who apparently enjoy “fixing” or “setting straight” those that need it, so be wise and reserve or refrain from being another man’s judge.
Tend to your own matters. The verse says there are issues “belonging not to” someone, suggesting that one should keep their hands, words, and thoughts to themself. Matthew 7:3-5 speaks of taking care of your own issues before you begin pointing out the issues of others. Everyone has faults, but decide you’ll take care of your own issues before busying yourself with that of others.
Ignore the bait. However tempted you are to jump into the dispute or debate, don’t forget that dogs tend to bite. You might get away with meddling several times, but sooner or later you will be bit.
Sowing and reaping is still a biblical truth. If you meddle in someone else’s business, sooner or later, others will meddle in yours. If you are quick to criticize or condemn others, others will soon criticize and condemn you. Don’t be deceived, whatever a man sows, he will reap (Galatians 6:7).
Be a peacemaker instead of a strife-finder. Making peace is a blessed thing (Matthew 5:9), but meddling in another’s business is a foolish habit (Proverbs 20:3).
So, before you respond with words, texts, or posts, stop and think before you act.
Where do we learn what a godly marriage looks like? Definitely not from the world. We can’t look at this world’s view of marriage because it is totally distorted! Marriage between a man and woman is now ridiculed and scorned! The culture we now live in pushes homosexuality, feminism, affairs, pornography, divorce, cohabitation, and many other agendas. You must have a healthy view of marriage and the only way to have that is to understand what a godly marriage looks like.
This is important, not only for you, but also for your kids! What they see in your marriage, they will grow up thinking normal and will replicate in their own marriages. This next generation depends on us to teach and exemplify what true biblical marriage is! Many children of pastors and missionaries have grown up in a hypocritical home that only outwardly showed God’s love. At home, their parents were one way and at church, they were another way. This is confusing for kids, and many have left the faith and have even gone to the total opposite extreme, renouncing God and turning to the world’s model of gender and social ideals. If you don’t believe this, just read Romans 1:20-32.
The biblical truth is that God created marriage to be a reflection of Jesus’ love and dedication for the church (us). When Satan destroys a good marriage, this picture is also destroyed. When the world sees a happily married couple, they marvel and God gets the glory! We need to work on our marriage because Satan is like a roaring lion, ready to devour it! He also wants to hurt your ministry, so when he destroys a marriage, he has killed two birds with one stone! How many missionaries and pastors would still be serving God today if they hadn’t stopped working on their marriage!
We can’t work on our marriage until we understand our roles in marriage. Genesis 2:18 says, “And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” This is the wife’s role to be a helper for him. It’s not demeaning. It’s an honor to be able to help our man! Many people would say that the wife is a second class citizen because God didn’t make her the head, but God uses the same word for help meet in the Hebrew (EZER) that he uses for Himself. The Lord is our EZER (our helper). Thank God we have a Helper as we are our husband’s helper!
In the next verse, Genesis 2:19, we find man’s role in life. “And out of the ground the Lord God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.” God gave man a job, and this gives him purpose in life. When we criticize our husband because of his job, we are stripping away his dignity because this is who God created him to be!
Genesis 2:20 says, “And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.” It seems here that God wanted Adam to see the void in his life, that he needed a companion too! As all those animals passed by him, he must have wondered, “Male, female, male, female, where’s my companion?”
We know the rest of the story because this is where we were created! God made women for a very specific purpose! We can be content only when we realize our role and take it seriously.
My husband often says, “If you are working on your marriage, your marriage is working!” So many people just give up. We have been married for over 24 years now and I can honestly say that it is the best thing that has happened to me, after salvation! I am so thankful for my husband and for his desire for us to continue to work on our marriage constantly.
Whether your marriage is good or bad, I would like to challenge you to work on the principles found in God’s Word! Every marriage could be better!
Each one of us have much for which to be thankful. Are you saved? Do you have a family? Has God allowed you to serve Him? Do you have friends? Are you alive and healthy? Do you have food, clothing, and a house to live? Simply put, it would do all of us good to make a list of what we are thankful for, and be vocal to God and others about His goodness in our lives.
Here at Vision Baptist Missions, we are super thankful for you! We pray you have a great Christmas season!
Welcome Noah Haught, VBM’s Newest Missionary!
I was blessed to grow up in a Christian home. Jesus Christ and our local church was the priority throughout my entire childhood, praise God! The night before my first day of kindergarten, I remember being burdened about my state as a lost sinner and in need of Christ. I spoke to my parents that night and made a profession of faith. As time went on, however, I began to forget the details of that night, and nobody else seemed to remember anything other than my own recounting of the moment! This coupled with sin in my life caused me to doubt my salvation. This persisted for years as I was too afraid to upend the image everyone had of me as a Christian! But at a teen camp in 2014 I coughed up my pride and spoke to my youth pastor about my salvation. He walked me through salvation as if I were a child and God gloriously saved me! I knew it all in my head but never made the connection to my heart.
Years later, the Lord began to burden my heart for missions via the ministry of other missionaries and two missions trips to South Africa. Since then, I have spent 13 months there for an internship and saw the Lord bless and work so mightily in my life. He is worthy of your everything! He answers prayers you forgot you had and blesses in ways you would never expect but fills you like none other! I eagerly look forward to serving Jesus Christ with the rest of my years as He sees fit!
PAC Meeting
On Thursday, we held the best Pastoral Advisory Committee meeting we’ve had since its inception. We rejoiced together what God has done, updated, prayed, and shared future plans. These men have been crucial to VBM!
As of January 1, 2025, Pastor Jason Georges will begin serving as the PAC chairman, and Pastor Kyle Coker will serve as the vice chairman. Pastor Matt Herrell fulfilled his leadership as chairman and will roll off end of the year. Also, Pastor Rick Spence, Pastor Keith Hamilton, and Pastor John Copeland, who have been with us from the beginning of the PAC, will be rolling off at the end of this year. We will make you aware of the three new pastors that will join the PAC in January.
Great Open House
God gave us a very good Open House, with 9 prospective students checking out the School of Missions. One young man signed up as a new student before he left campus!!! There were several good prospects, and we are praising the Lord!
Silicone Rings with Mark 16:15!
New silicone rings have arrived!! Some of the items we’ve used throughout the years for schools, colleges, and churches, are: bracelets, bag tags, fidget spinners, stickers, pens, and a few other things… and now we’re trying out silicone rings.
The Carey Center Classroom Project: A Call to Prayer, Participation, and Giving!
Every minute, 110 people die without Christ – many have never heard the gospel. Last year, VBM missionaries saw 931 professions of faith, 364 believers baptized, and 13 churches started! With your help, we want to partner with local churches to train and send even more missionaries! Please pray for a special classroom project on the VBM campus that will triple our training capacity, allowing us to train up to 60 missionaries and Christian leaders. The project will cost $246,000. You can give by check to Vision Baptist Missions with “Carey Center” in the memo or online at the link below.
“I also will not henceforth drive out any from before them of the nations which Joshua left when he died: that through them I may prove Israel, whether they will keep the way of the LORD to walk therein, as their fathers did keep it, or not.” — Judges 2:21-22
God had already provided Israel with the Promise Land, but He left enemies, according to this passage, “that through them I may prove Israel.” Would these obstacles stop Israel from walking with God, or would they cause Israel to cling to God? God could have easily kicked out, removed, and given an easier path for Israel, but He did not choose to do so. God left the enemies for the good of His people.
And in like manner, God is big enough and capable enough to remove the problems and obstacles in your life, whether financial strains, sicknesses, people problems, discouragement, stress, anxiety, or loneliness. It might just be that God doesn’t remove problems in your life to prove you. As when the Apostle Paul asked God to remove his hardships, God’s response was that His grace was sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9).
Yes, there are times that disobedience brings hard times in life, but sometimes it is just life happening that brings on difficulties. However the problems and obstacles may come, decide you will not fight against the methods that God uses in your life. God may not remove difficulties in your life because He wants you to depend on Him and remember that you cannot do life without Him. Allow the obstacles in your life to cause you to cling to God.
First, you learn so much about others! At church, you may talk to someone for a few minutes each time, but until you have them in your home and really spend time with them, you won’t really “know”them. You learn their burdens, things they may be going through that they wouldn’t share with you in a quick “hello” at church. You will have opportunities to help them in their marriage or raising their children. Also, they will learn what a godly home life looks like! New believers may have no idea what it is like to be in a happy home and see a happy marriage! They will notice the clean atmosphere, the godly music, the Bible lying on the coffee table. They will see that your life is different because of Christ. It is also great for your children to share in the excitement of having guests over! My kids will even cheerfully clean the house and prepare snacks if they are allowed to have friends over! The kids will carry this tradition well into their later years as they learn this example from you. They will have memories of sitting around the table hearing stories from different people who visit, whether a pastor from the USA or another missionary.
One of the reasons we don’t practice hospitality is because we are selfish. Even 2 Peter 4:9 hits the nail on the head when it says, “Use hospitality without grudging.” The devil knows that believers are strengthened when they fellowship with one another so he will fight you on this one! Another reason is because we are too busy. We just simply don’t make time. We don’t schedule it in our calendar! We come from a fast-paced society. Your people most likely welcome you into their home, want you to stay for hours and love every minute of it! It is common to see nationals sitting outside their homes, talking to their friends and neighbors, at least in my experience of Latin America. In the USA, you barely get to know your neighbors in a lifetime because everyone is so busy. Slow down. Learn their pace of life in this aspect. It is warm and welcoming. Of course, I’m only speaking on what I have seen in Latin American countries, but for the most part, people in general want to build friendships. They won’t know that you care if you don’t take the time to care (Hebrews 13:1-2, Romans 12:13).
Hospitality is easier if you are a good housekeeper. I can be a little over the top with housekeeping and not want to have guests over unless my house is spotless and clutter-free, but with five children and a dog, there is just never a moment in my life that the house is perfect! I have to push my perfectionistic tendencies to the side so that I can allow people into my home. It’s also good for them to see that I’m not always perfect, and that there may be messes in my home just like in their own!
On the other hand, you may be on the other extreme and never clean your house and not even care. It may get so bad that you get called up to be featured in the next “Hoarders” episode! I’m kidding! Sadly, this can be a poor reflection not only on your family, but also on our Lord. 2 Corinthians 14:40 says, “Let all things be done decently and in order,” and in Titus 2:5 we are instructed to be “keepers of the home.” Why is your home a mess? Is it because of laziness? Are you too busy watching TV or scrolling on Instagram? I understand that in different seasons of life, you will just have to let things go. A new baby, packing up to leave for furlough, or even during the language school years, it can be difficult to find the time to keep up with all the household duties.
There are some daily tasks that help me keep up with everything. Maybe you can put some of these into practice: throw in a load of wash, make your bed, wash the dishes, pick up clutter and sweep the floor before your husband gets home for the day. Let your children help! As they grow, their responsibilities grow! Even a three-year old can pick up his toys! A six-or-seven-year old can learn to do laundry, wash dishes, and take out the trash! Many times they are even happy to do these chores with you! To be ready for “pop-in” guests, I try to always have the living room, kitchen and bathroom picked up. Teach your children to take off their shoes in a certain spot in the house and put away any belongings as soon as they walk in the door. “A place for everything and everything in it’s place” may be an old, outdated saying, but it helps with the clutter.
No one expects perfection when they visit you. It’s not what you do for your guests or how you do it, but the welcoming spirit you have when you do it.
