The following is an exert from chapter 9 of the book Missionary Guidebook For Ladies by Mindy Bush
First, you learn so much about others! At church, you may talk to someone for a few minutes each time, but until you have them in your home and really spend time with them, you won’t really “know”them. You learn their burdens, things they may be going through that they wouldn’t share with you in a quick “hello” at church. You will have opportunities to help them in their marriage or raising their children. Also, they will learn what a godly home life looks like! New believers may have no idea what it is like to be in a happy home and see a happy marriage! They will notice the clean atmosphere, the godly music, the Bible lying on the coffee table. They will see that your life is different because of Christ. It is also great for your children to share in the excitement of having guests over! My kids will even cheerfully clean the house and prepare snacks if they are allowed to have friends over! The kids will carry this tradition well into their later years as they learn this example from you. They will have memories of sitting around the table hearing stories from different people who visit, whether a pastor from the USA or another missionary.
One of the reasons we don’t practice hospitality is because we are selfish. Even 2 Peter 4:9 hits the nail on the head when it says, “Use hospitality without grudging.” The devil knows that believers are strengthened when they fellowship with one another so he will fight you on this one! Another reason is because we are too busy. We just simply don’t make time. We don’t schedule it in our calendar! We come from a fast-paced society. Your people most likely welcome you into their home, want you to stay for hours and love every minute of it! It is common to see nationals sitting outside their homes, talking to their friends and neighbors, at least in my experience of Latin America. In the USA, you barely get to know your neighbors in a lifetime because everyone is so busy. Slow down. Learn their pace of life in this aspect. It is warm and welcoming. Of course, I’m only speaking on what I have seen in Latin American countries, but for the most part, people in general want to build friendships. They won’t know that you care if you don’t take the time to care (Hebrews 13:1-2, Romans 12:13).
Hospitality is easier if you are a good housekeeper. I can be a little over the top with housekeeping and not want to have guests over unless my house is spotless and clutter-free, but with five children and a dog, there is just never a moment in my life that the house is perfect! I have to push my perfectionistic tendencies to the side so that I can allow people into my home. It’s also good for them to see that I’m not always perfect, and that there may be messes in my home just like in their own!
On the other hand, you may be on the other extreme and never clean your house and not even care. It may get so bad that you get called up to be featured in the next “Hoarders” episode! I’m kidding! Sadly, this can be a poor reflection not only on your family, but also on our Lord. 2 Corinthians 14:40 says, “Let all things be done decently and in order,” and in Titus 2:5 we are instructed to be “keepers of the home.” Why is your home a mess? Is it because of laziness? Are you too busy watching TV or scrolling on Instagram? I understand that in different seasons of life, you will just have to let things go. A new baby, packing up to leave for furlough, or even during the language school years, it can be difficult to find the time to keep up with all the household duties.
There are some daily tasks that help me keep up with everything. Maybe you can put some of these into practice: throw in a load of wash, make your bed, wash the dishes, pick up clutter and sweep the floor before your husband gets home for the day. Let your children help! As they grow, their responsibilities grow! Even a three-year old can pick up his toys! A six-or-seven-year old can learn to do laundry, wash dishes, and take out the trash! Many times they are even happy to do these chores with you! To be ready for “pop-in” guests, I try to always have the living room, kitchen and bathroom picked up. Teach your children to take off their shoes in a certain spot in the house and put away any belongings as soon as they walk in the door. “A place for everything and everything in it’s place” may be an old, outdated saying, but it helps with the clutter.
No one expects perfection when they visit you. It’s not what you do for your guests or how you do it, but the welcoming spirit you have when you do it.
