Overcoming Grief #1 of 2
Excerpt taken from book Overcomers, A Study on Gaining Victory Over the Obstacles in Life by Jeffrey Bush
Grief can be considered a deep sorrow, misery, sadness, anguish, pain, distress, agony, torment, affliction, suffering, heartache, heartbreak, broken-heartedness, or heaviness of heart.
There are many reasons for which grief enters into one’s life. The following are a few reasons that you or someone you know may face grief: loss of a loved one, loss of a job, being criticized or spoken about negatively by someone else, sickness of a loved one, or tragedy in your life or the life of someone you love. Grief is no respecter of persons and seems to creep its way into the life of almost everyone at some point in time. Although some problems or situations can be avoided, grief usually sneaks in without permission and tends to stays longer than one desires. We cannot avoid all the circumstances that bring grief, but we can learn to overcome grief by using God’s principles.
I’ll never forget the day my wife and I went to the hospital to find out the gender of our newest baby. We were living in Argentina and my wife was four months pregnant. It was finally time for the doctor to tell us if we were going to have a boy or girl. God had already given us three precious girls and we were excited to find out what our next gift from God was going to be. We made our way from the waiting room to the doctor’s office, where my wife sat on the table. The doctor began using a sonogram scanner on my wife’s stomach to take pictures of the baby. After a few attempts, the doctor left the room and came in with another doctor. Within minutes, a few other doctors came into the room, and we knew something was not right. My wife began crying and I was trying to console her, letting her know all would be just fine. But things weren’t fine. The doctor finally broke the news to us that our precious child was dead in the womb. The unwanted visitor of grief struck our household that day and stayed with us for a long time.
Grief sometimes has a way of trampling people to a point at which they no longer believe or want anything to do with God. Too many times I’ve witnessed people go through grief and become bitter at God instead of growing and drawing closer to God. When grief strikes, it may not always be understood and certainly not welcomed, but as a Christian, we can run to God’s Word and research some truths for times of grief.
God works all things for our good.
Listen to the promise of Romans 8:28: “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose.” Do you love God? Well, according to this verse, God can use even the bad for your good. Grief may look like an ugly frog, but God might just have plans to turn it into a handsome prince. It might not make sense to you now, or ever, but somewhere inside of this bad situation, God has plans to use it for your good and for His glory.
Before we can move on, you have to get this fact straight. Nothing surprises God or can happen without His knowledge. Your loving God wants to do something even in the midst of this nasty storm you are going through. Don’t lose hope; your rock and refuge is God. Your hope is not in another person or in your own ability to manage the situation. Rest assured that God knows best, and He can make this work for good.
But what about a loved one that died? Why? What about a crippling or even fatal illness? Why? Dear friend, I do not know why God allows certain things, but I do know that you can take His promises to the bank and He said that ALL things are going to work together for good, not for bad. God knows better and has a plan through it all. You will never understand everything, but you can understand that God knows best.
I love the words that our Lord gave to Israel in Isaiah 43:2: “When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.” And the words that the suffering servant of God, Job, said in Job 23:10: “But he knoweth the way that I take: when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold.” You see, God might allow you to go through some hard times, but God has a plan and a purpose.
If you lost a loved one that was saved, know that you will see them in Heaven.
Paul told the believers in Thessalonica that they didn’t have to be ignorant concerning the death of a child of God. In fact, they didn’t have to sorrow “as others which have no hope” (1 Thessalonians 4:13). Certainly, it hurts when we lose a loved one, but we can know they’re not lost or gone forever, they are with the Lord. For a child of God, their last breath upon the earth is their first breath in Heaven (Philippians 1:23). There is no purgatory, soul sleep, or waiting period for a child of God. “To be absent from the body is to be present with the Lord” (2 Corinthians 5:8).
The Psalmist says it pretty straightforwardly: “Precious in the sight of the Lord is the death of his saints” (Psalm 116:15). It is painful in our eyes to have a loved one die, but to God, it is precious. Grief doesn’t have to overcome us as God’s children.